The Unfunny Humours, Taming those tresses, How to embroider and the latest love poem from Chaucer – June’s issue of ‘The Chastity Belt.’

By Catherine T Wilson

For our 2022 advent calendar, we decided to create a set of magazine covers in the likeness of Dolly or Cosmopolitan that capture the medieval essence. If such a journal could have existed, what sort of articles would it have contained? Anything and everything to assist the young maiden about to set out on her life’s journey as a wife and mother, and once there, all the information needed to be a good spouse and keep her husband satisfied, and at home when not away soldiering.

Such were our efforts that we now find ourselves tasked with writing some of these articles!  Well, why not? It might be fun… So please enjoy the snippets below from the May issues of The Chastity Belt.

It must also be mentioned that some articles in these blogs are written as they would have appeared directly in the ‘magazine’, whilst others, due to wanting to be as informative as possible, are written from the present-day point of view. Either way, please enjoy.

ARE YOUR HUMOURS OUT OF BALANCE?

TEN TIPS TO GET BACK ON YOUR FEET

Ladies, we are all aware of the four humours of the human body, namely sanguine (blood), yellow bile (choleric), black bile (melancholic) and phlegm (phlegmatic)

and how these four substances are organised around the four elements of matter (earth, water, air and fire), the four qualities of cold, hot, moist and dry, as well as around the four seasons, and even around the planets. Even our emotions are connected to the humours.

These four bodily substances must remain in harmony to be healthy. What then, can you do, if you are feeling a little ‘out of balance?’  Well, you might try these suggestions or adjust any of the following if you feel they are not what they should be. But do remember to consult a physician or an apothecary if the condition persists!

  1. Place yourself somewhere in which you can breathe good, fresh air.
  2. Make sure you consume the right kind of foods
  3. Make sure you consume the right kind of drink
  4. Be sure to avail yourself of some daily activity, preferably outside (see tip no. 1)
  5. Be sure to avail yourself of regular nightly repose
  6. Refrain from having too much sleep
  7. Refrain from having too much wakefulness
  8. Be sure you have regular daily expulsions
  9. Be moderate in your joy
  10. Be especially moderate in your fear and anxieties

HOW TO TAME YOUR LOOSE LOCKS

Having trouble taming those tormenting tresses? Then we are here to help you!

Our resident researcher checked out resources written by the famous Lady Trota of Salerno, (Ladies, the volume of Trotula; three medical texts for women written by three authors is MUST HAVE!) and passages from Tacuinum Sanitatis came up with this advice:-

Of course, your health has a lot to do with the condition of your hair, so if you are ‘under the weather,’ do be sure to read the article of getting your humours back in balance!

A good tip for starting is to always use a good comb made of boxwood, bone or ivory.

WASHING THE HAIR

Use a creamy mixture of ashes, vine stalks and egg whites to clean the hair and scalp or combine your favourite herbs or plant extractions with liquorice. Another is chamomile flowers infused in lye.

Crushed herbs mixed with olive oil can be combed through the hair to promote growth and make it smooth.

CONDITIONING THE HAIR

To condition the hair crush your favourite flowers and herbs, add essences of woods and spices to make a paste or mix with rose water to comb through the hair. This will also ward off demons!

From the ‘Trotula’ specifically:-

When she combs her hair, let her have this powder.

Take some dried roses, clove, nutmeg, watercress and galangal. Let all these, powdered, be mixed with rose water.

With this water let her sprinkle her hair and comb it with a comb dipped in this same water so that [her hair] will smell better.

And let her make furrows in her hair and sprinkle on the above-mentioned powder, and it will smell marvellously.

FOR TANGLE-FREE HAIR

A conditioner of pig lard and lizard can help remove knots. It is recommended to use rosewater, cloves and nutmeg on your comb after to remove the lard odour!

FOR A DRY FLAKY SCALP OR DANDRUFF

Treat scalp by washing with a preparation of willow tree leaves or bark soaked in wine.

Use the juice of beets mixed with water and vinegar for dandruff. It can also prevent hair loss.

TO TREAT HAIR LOSS

Use a tincture of aloe vera mixed with wine or straight onion juice. Rub into scalp.

Peach tree kernels, bruised and boiled in vinegar. Cool and apply to thinning areas.

TO COLOUR THE HAIR

First pre-condition the hair (this is important!)

Do this with pomegranate peel, vinegar, oak apples, alum or ash before applying the colouring agent.

FOR BLONDE HAIR

To lighten the hair, you have a choice of methods:-

Mix boxwood with agrimony.

Mix saffron and onion skins with stale sheep’s urine.

Sit in the sun after applying a tincture of white wine and olive oil.

It is also recommended for women with blonde hair to wear opal necklaces to prevent the hair from fading.

To enhance the gold, ashes of barberry and water may be used.

FOR DARK COLOURED HAIR

Use black henbane or sage to darken the colour.

Try soaking in water from steeped walnut shells.

Bramble leaves boiled in rye.

Once you have tamed these luscious locks, read on to see how you can best style them and be sure to see the article on how best to dress your veil!

VEILS ARE BACK! HOW TO MAKE YOURS LOOK STUNNING

Your mother or maid probably scolded you at some point when you excitedly ran out of the room without your head dressed correctly, that is – wearing your veil. I know I was! On many an occasion. And as a good and obedient daughter or ward, you returned and allowed them to finish dressing your hair without question even though beneath your gown, your feet were doing a dance that would run rings around the Scottish.  

Except one time, I did question it. And this is what my mother told me.

Married ladies no longer need the long, flowing locks of a maiden to attract a husband. We, matrons, have already accomplished that, but now there is a bevy of reasons as to why we cover up.

There is, of course, the religious nature of veiling to display modesty and restrict any flaunting of beauty for which our married status strictly forbids us. (No, the Church does not agree with the nature of courtly love).  Also, to keep control of our long hair so that one may carry out their daily tasks without hinderance. It is also more hygienic by preventing the transmission of lice and to prevent damage from both woodsmoke and the sun.

So, when the time comes and your husband wishes to avail himself of your beautiful golden (or brunette, red, or black) tresses, they are in the very best condition. I must admit that my husband loves to wrap my golden mane around him and … ahem! Where was I? Oh yes, veils. Well, to help you along, just keep scrolling down. And you will need a few implements to assist you such as veil pins, a simple material fillet and cap.  

Tutorial: How to wear 14th Century veils and wimples – The De Caversham Household (wordpress.com)

HOW TO EMBROIDER

The art of embroidery is considered luxurious; sumptuous fabrics decorated in silk, gold and silver thread for the finest clothing available only to the upper classes, or religious and secular narrative scenes adorning altars and vestibules in churches, but just how is this painstaking and precise, not to mention time consuming art form accomplished?

Example from the Opus Anglicanun exhibition

The main technique used today is called ‘Opus Anglicanum’ (English work). The stitches used are laid and couched work, stem and satin stitch, split stitch, and chain stitch. Couching is the technique of laying thread on top of the fabric and tying it down with a second thread, (or in the case of laid work, threads). First the design is drawn out on paper and transferred to the fabric with charcoal in a technique known as ‘pouncing’.

The design is then embroidered using two techniques which were characteristic of English medieval embroidery: split stitch (shown here with white and coloured silk thread), and underside couching (usually silver or gold, as here).

The small figure recreated below will take a medieval embroider roughly 35 hours to complete.

Here are ten comon stitches to help you get started, but there are at least sixteen more I can share in a later issue.

Here are some examples of such embroidery.

CHAUCER’S LATEST LOVE POEM

I couldn’t do this next piece without some formal introduction to our subject’s guest, Geoffrey Chaucer.

Geoffrey was an English poet, author, and civil servant, and around 1357 he became page in the household of Elizabeth de Burgh, wife to Lionel of Antwerp, King Edward III’s second son, thus bringing him into the court circle.

During the early years of ‘The Hundred Years War,’ Geoffrey travelled with Lionel’s household to France as part of the English army. He was captured during the Siege of Rheims in 1360 and Edward sent a courier to pay his ransom of sixteen pounds (equal to over twenty-one thousand pounds in 2021) and thus Geoffrey made his first appearance in Lions and Lilies for the courier Edward employed was none other than Gillet de Bellegarde!

Chaucer has been called the ‘father of English literature,’ or the ‘father of English poetry.’ He was the first writer to be buried in Westminster Abbey in what has since become Poets’ Corner.

The poem, ‘Merciless Beauty’ is written as a triple rondel. A rondel has two quatrains that are followed by a quintet, a set of five lines. The verse form has its origins in lyrical poetry of 14th-century France. In the case of traditional rondels, the first two lines of the first stanza are refrains. This means that the lines are used and reused at other moments in the text.

This poem is venerating a beautiful woman with whom the author has fallen deeply in love. Drawn by her eyes, he, who was once serene, now finds himself shaken by the depth of his feelings and keenly feels the sharp pain in his heart by her refusal or abandonment. So much, he declares that she has no pity for him so it is useless for him to complain. And her beauty is so great, it has left her without mercy. He will die loving her. Until the third quatrain when he is released from Love’s prison, where he states if he must love, he will love with his whole heart (fat) for he never expected to be sparing with his feelings (lean), but now that he has escaped, he will not return to such a tormenting prison again.

Merciles Beaute’ is known from only one other surviving manuscript, Magdalene Collage Cambridge MS Pepys 2006. Original version and a translation follows. Here is the article as it appeared in our fictional June issue of ‘The Chastity Belt.’

*****************

Dearest maidens and ladies of distinction,

We know you have all been waiting for our latest instalment into the writing of our handsome poet, Geoffrey Chaucer. Dare I say it, you will not be disappointed! It is everything we maidens love reading; penned with such feeling it will have tears flowing gracefully down your cheeks! Of whom does our mysterious man speak? A true love abandoned, mayhap? A one-time lover? Or some wonderous lady that he set upon a pedestal and adored from afar, married perhaps and unattainable! You decide…

Merciles Beaute

I

Your yen two wol slee me sodenly;

I may the beautee of hem not sustene,

So woundeth hit throughout my herte kene.

And but your word wol helen hastily

My hertes wounde, while that hit is grene,

Your yen two wol slee me sodenly;

I may the beautee of hem not sustene.

Upon my trouthe I sey you feithfully

That ye ben of my lyf and deeth the quene;

For with my deeth the trouthe shal be sene.

Your yen two wol slee me sodenly;

I may the beautee of hem not sustene,

So woundeth it throughout my herte kene.

II

So hath your beautee fro your herte chaced

Pitee, that me ne availeth not to pleyne;

For Daunger halt your mercy in his cheyne.

Giltles my deeth thus han ye me purchaced;

I sey you sooth, me nedeth not to feyne;

So hath your beautee fro your herte chaced

Pitee, that me ne availeth not to pleyne.

Allas! that Nature hath in you compassed

So greet beautee, that no man may atteyne

To mercy, though he sterve for the peyne.

So hath your beautee fro your herte chaced

Pitee, that me ne availeth not to pleyne;

For Daunger halt your mercy in his cheyne.

III

Sin I fro Love escaped am so fat,

I never thenk to ben in his prison lene;

Sin I am free, I counte him not a bene.

He may answere, and seye this and that;

I do no fors, I speke right as I mene.

Sin I fro Love escaped am so fat

I never thenk to ben in his prison lene.

Love hath my name ystrike out of his sclat,

And he is strike out of my bokes clene

For evermo; [ther] is non other mene.

Sin I fro Love escaped am so fat,

I never thenk to ben in his prison lene;

Sin I am free, I counte him not a bene.

Translation

Your eyes two whole slay me suddenly;

I may the beauty of them not sustain

So wounds it, throughout my heart keen.

Unless your word will heal, all hastily,

My heart’s wound while it is yet green,

Your eyes two whole slay me suddenly;

I may the beauty of them not sustain.

By my truth, I tell you faithfully

That you are of my life and death the queen,

For at my death the truth shall be seen:

Your eyes two whole slay me suddenly;

I may the beauty of them not sustain,

So wounds it throughout my heart keen.

So has your beauty from your heart chased

Pity, that it avails not to complain,

For Pride holds your mercy by a chain.

Though guiltless, my death you have purchased.

I tell you truly, needing not to feign,

So has your beauty from your heart chased

Pity, that it avails not to complain.

Alas, that Nature has in you placed

Such great beauty that no man may attain

To mercy though he die from the pain,

So has your beauty from your heart chased

Pity, that it avails not to complain,

For Pride holds your mercy by a chain.

Since I’m from Love escaped yet so fat,

I never plan to be in his prison lean;

Since I am free, I count it not a bean.

He may answer and say this and that;

I care not: I’ll speak just as I mean.

Since I’m from Love escaped yet so fat,

I never plan to be in his prison lean.

Love strikes my name from his slate flat,

And he is struck out of my books clean

For evermore; my sole course it has been.

Since I’m from Love escaped yet so fat,

I never plan to be in his prison lean;

Since I am free, I count it not a bean.

Note from translator:

Merciless Beauty, one of the great glories of English poetry, is particularly difficult to translate without damage. Chosen here, for the sake of clarity, to substitute eyes for eyen, thus losing some of the music, and to use the modern sustain replacing sustene thus destroying the strict rhyme.

Catherine A Wilson co-writes with Catherine T Wilson (no relation). Their first book, The Lily and the Lion, was based upon their true-life accidental meeting and resulting friendship. All four books in their ‘Lions and Lilies’ series have won first place prizes in the Chatelaine/Chaucer Awards in the US and in 2019, The Traitor’s Noose won the Grand Prize Chaucer Award.

The Lily and the Lion – 1st Place Chanticleer Chatelaine Award – 2014

The Order of the Lily – 1st Place Chanticleer Chatelaine Award – 2015

The Gilded Crown – 1st Place Chanticleer Chaucer Award – 2016The Traitor’s Noose – Grand Prize WINNER Chanticleer Chaucer Award – 2017